Saturday, August 18, 2007

Dennis Hastert is out, dude!

Another criminal Republican goes down, dude! Maybe he can become a trainer for the WNWA now, brother.

Rep. Dennis Hastert announced Friday he will not seek re-election next year, ending what will be a 22-year run in Congress that at its pinnacle made him the most powerful member of the House of Representatives and next in line to succeed the president behind the vice president.

"After all these years, it only seems fitting to reunite here in this place as I announce my future plans. And as some have now speculated, after much consideration I have decided not to seek another term in Congress," the Illinois Republican told the audience gathered at the Kendall County courthouse in Yorkville, Ill.

Hastert's remarks were interrupted several times by applause, but maybe the heaviest shouts of approval came when he made reference to his humble beginnings.

"Who would have guessed that a wrestling coach from Kendall County in Illinois would be the longest-serving Republican speaker of the House of Representatives?" he asked to a loud roar.
Last week, Hastert sent out a letter to supporters amid some secrecy, setting a date and time for an announcement, but the subject of the announcement wasn't clear, only that it was "an important announcement regarding my future."

As news of the announcement surfaced, most expected that the subject was about his campaign intentions — and most believed that he would announce his retirement after he served his term.

Officially, his staff didn't reveal his intentions, but congressional aides confirmed to several sources this week that Hastert would not seek re-election. And in media interviews late Thursday and early Friday, Hastert confirmed as much.

Leading up to the announcement Friday, light jazz played over the speaker system. When Hastert took the podium, he stood in front of the courthouse in the town where he used to coach high school wrestling, backed by his wife, Jean, and other family members. Loud applause erupted as he addressed a group gathered on a warm summer morning, some holding Hastert campaign posters.

Hastert pointed to local achievements as well as national ones -- like allowing seniors to work while receiving Social Security, allowing for health savings accounts and passing the Medicare prescription drug program.

"We repealed the death tax. We delivered the two largest tax cuts in American history, because we trusted people to make their own decisions with their own money," Hastert said, adding that while those programs fuel the U.S. economy, "our critics just didn't get it, and frankly, they still don't."

Hastert said the most important legislation passed under his tenure were national and homeland security-related laws following the Sept. 11, 2001, attacks.

"On that dark day, for our nation, congressional leaders vowed to do whatever was necessary to protect our citizens from future attacks. And that is exactly what we did," Hastert said, pointing to intelligence-sharing measures taken.

"Beyond our borders, we made good on our promise to identify and eliminate those targeting the United States, wherever they reside. And Americans can disagree about national defense strategy, but there is no arguing that we led Congress to taking critical steps that have kept our citizens safe from attack," Hastert said.

After finishing his brief remarks, Hastert waded through the crowd packed with media and friends, hugging them and shaking their hands.

Hastert became speaker in 1999, succeeding Republican Newt Gingrich. Hastert went on to be the longest-serving Republican speaker of the House. He was succeeded this year by Rep. Nancy Pelosi, D-Calif., after Republicans lost control of the House in last November's elections.
The Republican majority in Congress was threatened heading into last year's elections with a number of congressional ethics investigations coming to a head, as well as public opinion over the GOP-led White House and Congress' administration over the Iraq war.

When the dust settled, Republicans had lost 30 seats in the House, and Hastert pulled himself out of the running for Republican leadership positions for the new Congress.

Speaking to reporters shortly after the event Friday, Hastert indicated he would serve out the rest of his term, saying he's going to "continue to serve as long as I feel I can be effective in the Congress, and that's what my intent was."

He declined to say if he planned to back any candidate.

"I have to wait to see who files," he said.

He also said he's not sure what he'll do next, adding that it would not be proper for him to arrange something until he has left the House.

In a lighter question about his thinner appearance, he admitted: "I've lost a couple pounds. ... I eat about a third of what I ate before, and I try to stay at it."

Some of Hastert's most powerful friends issued statements after his announcement, praising him as a person and his stewardship over Congress.

"He is a good and decent man, and he was a strong and effective speaker," President Bush said.
"During his two decades in Congress, Denny rose through the ranks as a hard-working member whom colleagues on both sides came to admire, trust, and respect ... As my good friend prepares to move on to the next phase of his life, he has my gratitude for his distinguished service."

House Minority Leader John Boehner saluted Hastert for his continued fight for the party agenda, including fighting Democratic energy proposals and boosting domestic energy sources.
"Now, even after his tenure as speaker, his days of effective legislating continue. I look forward to serving beside him for the next year and a half, and I am eager to serve beside his Republican successor in the years to come. In the meantime, I wish Denny and Jean all the best as they prepare for the next stage of their lives," Boehner said.

Business

Last night I destroyed The GOP and gained revenge on that short bus riding David Downs, dude.

Now, for more important things. I have a match against that wannabe library custodian who couldn't cut it, Big Pimpin' Ernest and some one-armed cajun named Amos Moses. Well, dudes, I'll whip your asses at the next WNWA Wrestling show. I also have the choice of any partner on the WNWA roster, brother, so whatcha gonna do when Liberalmania runs wild on you, dude!!?!

I have also been the target of false accusations recently and had legal charges brought against me. Well, Judge Jennings will see to it that nothing comes of these false charges.

Tuesday, August 7, 2007

Sam Bash is my bitch!

Tonight, I once again dominated that diabolical, redneck conservative Sam Bash on national TV. He thought he had me with his Texas Cloverleaf, but I countered that foolish manuever, brother. He was whining that I was holding the ropes, but the ref can't call what the ref doesn't see, dude! Just like voter fraud in Philly, you gotta prove it, brother- unlike the debacles in Florida and Ohio- that doesn't need to be proven because we know it happened, dude. I will now focus my attention on that other conservative, Ass Butte. However, I need a tune up match before the next PPV, so I am challenging those retarded ass clowns The GOP to a handicap match at the next WNWA Wrestling show for my UN/ACLU Championship, brother.

Monday, August 6, 2007

Liberal Bloggers Unite!!

We are going to do this, brother!! Power to the people, dude!

Bloggers Consider Forming Labor Union

Monday August 6, 9:24 am ET By Ashley M. Heher, AP Business Writer

Left-Leaning Bloggers Debate Forming Labor Union

CHICAGO (AP) -- Do bloggers need their own Norma Rae?

In a move that might make some people scratch their heads, a loosely formed coalition of left-leaning bloggers are trying to band together to form a labor union they hope will help them receive health insurance, conduct collective bargaining or even set professional standards.

The effort is an extension of the blogosphere's growing power and presence, especially within the political realm, and for many, evokes memories of the early labor organization of freelance writers in the early 1980s.

Organizers hope a bloggers' labor group will not only showcase the growing professionalism of the Web-based writers, but also the importance of their roles in candidates' campaigns.

"I think people have just gotten to the point where people outside the blogosphere understand the value of what it is that we do on the progressive side," said Susie Madrak, the author of Suburban Guerilla blog, who is active in the union campaign. "And I think they feel a little more entitled to ask for something now."

But just what that something is may be hard to say.

In a world as diverse, vocal and unwieldy as the blogosphere, there's no consensus about what type of organization is needed and who should be included. Some argue for a free-standing association for activist bloggers while others suggest a guild open to any blogger -- from knitting fans to video gamers -- that could be created within established labor groups.

Others see a blogger coalition as a way to find health insurance discounts, fight for press credentials or even establish guidelines for dealing with advertising and presenting data on page views.

"It would raise the professionalism," said Leslie Robinson, a writer at ColoradoConfidential.com. "Maybe we could get more jobs, bona fide jobs."

But not everyone is on board.

"The reason I like blogging is that it's very anarchistic. I can do whatever I want whenever I want, and oh my God, you're not going to tell me what to do," said Curt Hopkins, the founder of the Committee to Protect Bloggers.

"The blogosphere is such a weird term and such a weird idea. It's anyone who wants to do it," Hopkins said. "There's absolutely no commonality there. How will they find a commonality to go on? I think it's doomed to failure on any sort of large scale."

About 11 percent of American Internet users have created Web pages or blogs for others while eight percent have created their own online journals or Weblogs, according to the Pew Internet & American Life Project.

With pages focused on everything from bird watching to celebrity footwear, more than 120,000 blogs are created every day and more than 58,000 new posts are made each hour, according to data from Technorati, which tracks more than 94 million blogs worldwide.

Few bloggers are paid for their posts, and even fewer are able to make a living doing the work. But many say they often devote as much energy and time to their online musings as they do to their salaried careers.

While bloggers work to organize their own labor movement, their growing numbers are already being courted by some unions.

"Bloggers are on our radar screen right now for approaching and recruiting into the union," said Gerry Colby, president of the National Writers Union, a local of the United Auto Workers. "We're trying to develop strategies to reach bloggers and encourage them to join."

Unsurprisingly, there's decidedly less support for a union movement among conservative bloggers.

Mark Noonan, an editor at Blogs for Bush and a senior writer at GOP Bloggers, said he worries that a blogger union would undermine the freewheeling nature of the blogosphere, regardless of its political composition.

"We just go out there and write what is on our mind, damn the critics," he said. "To make a union is to start to provide a firm structure for the blogosphere and that would merely make the blogosphere a junior-league (mainstream media). ... Get us a union and other 'professional' organizations and we'll start to be conformist and we'll start to be just another special interest."
But that's not how Kirsten Burgard sees it.

Sitting at a panel titled "A Union for Bloggers: It's Time to Organize" at this week's YearlyKos Convention for bloggers in Chicago, Burgard said she'd welcome a chance to join a unionized blogging community.

"I sure would like to have that union bug on my Web site," said Burgard, a blogger who uses the moniker Bendy Girl.

Madrak hopes that regardless the form, the labor movement ultimately will help bloggers pay for medical bills. It's important, she said, because some bloggers can spend hours a day tethered to computers as they update their Web sites.

"Blogging is very intense -- physically, mentally," she said. "You're constantly scanning for news. You're constantly trying to come up with information that you think will mobilize your readers. In the meantime, you're sitting at a computer and your ass is getting wider and your arm and neck and shoulder are wearing out because you're constantly using a mouse."

Committee to Protect Bloggers: http://committeetoprotectbloggers.civiblog.org

National Writers Union: http://www.nwu.org

Pew Internet & American Life Project: http://www.pewinternet.org

Technorati: http://technorati.com

It's over, brother!

Just like I'm going to do to Ass Butte, Hillary is doing it to Obama. Stick a fork in Uncle Tobama, he's done. Hillary will be coronated on 1-20-09, dudes.

Latest USAToday/Gallup Poll gives Clinton 22-point lead over Obama

"New York Sen. Hillary Rodham Clinton has significantly widened her lead over Illinois Sen. Barack Obama for the Democratic presidential nomination," USA TODAY Washington bureau chief Susan Page writes.

She tells us that according to the latest USA TODAY/Gallup Poll, Clinton's support among Democrats and independent voters who "lean" Democratic stands at 48%. -- up eight percentage points from three weeks ago.

Obama's support: 26%, down two points. In third: Former North Carolina senator John Edwards, at 12%.

It's probably not surprising that strategists for the two top Democrats have sharply different takes on the news.

"People are seeing her as the one ready to be president," Mark Penn, Clinton's chief strategist, told Susan. Bill Burton, Obama’s spokesman, dismissed the findings. "National polls may go up and down before people actually start voting, but their irrelevance will not," he said.

Susan, in a story that will be posted later this evening at USATODAY.com, will also report that on the Republican side, "the race was stable: Former New York mayor Rudy Giuliani at 33%, former Tennessee senator Fred Thompson at 21%, Arizona Sen. John McCain at 16% and former Massachusetts governor Mitt Romney at 8%.

The survey was taken Friday through Sunday. It has a margin of error of +/- 5 percentage points for the responses on the Democratic and Republican races.

Sunday, August 5, 2007

Joy


I found a beautiful picture of my former love and current boss, the lovely, wonderful Jewish Joy Bozkivitz. This picture was taken at our recent training trip to Venice Beach, CA.


YearlyKos

Well, little libsters, I am at the YearlyKos convention in Chicago, dudes, and am I having fun?!? This place is awesome. I have met many wonderful people. I am here with my main squeeze Gail, and we have been partying it up, brother! I got to attend my queen Hillary's breakout session today and just had a gay old time (pardon the pun, honey!) Unfortunately, I did have a bit of a problem with a blogger by the name of Marginalguy. The guy was just weird, dude. Well, I gave him a Cut and Run right on the floor of the Covention Center, dude!! I then performed my patented Late Term Abortion and get the heck out of Dodge, brothers. I'm now headed back to Braddock for the Tuesday night show where I will defend my title against that dastardly conservative Southerner, Sam Bash.

Friday, August 3, 2007

My Struggle

Here is a brief synopsis of my glorious life, brother.

I am a pacifist, unless I feels that someone is a conservative. I am a librarian turned wrestler. I underwent this transformation as a way to "Liberalize" the conservative South. I'm heavily involved with Democratic politics and I know that unless the conservative South can be swayed, the Liberals will never dominate American politics, dude. Since I think that Southern culture and wrestling are synonymous, I took up this challenge.

My earliest years were care free as both parents had high paying union jobs at General Motors' Flint, MI plant and I had my first cousin Carl Reubens as a playmate. However, things soured when my Uncle (Reuben's father) had to flee the area beacuae of dodging the Vietnam War draft. I would only see his cousin sporadically until later in life. After this devastating event, I faced more adversity as both my parents were laid off from the General Motors plant when I was five. My father left, and my mother, Rhonda, soon found companionship with another woman, Lakeesha. My only friend at this time was Michael Moore--who offered his friendship as long as I gave him my lunch money.

When I was fourteen, my father Jody won custody of me and I moved to Gary, IN to live with my father and his same sex-partner Rufus. I recall that during this period of my life, I routinely blacked-out after he consumed drinks called "Mud Monkeys" provided by my father or Rufus and woke up the next day with a sore anus. I attribute the black-outs to stress. I still have a fondness for Mud Monkeys.

At seventeen in 1989, I enrolled at Earlham College in Richmond, IN, earning a bachelor's degree, then a Master's Degree both in Women's Studies. I then enrolled at Clark Atlanta University and studied Library Science and African American studies.

With all these highly useful degrees, I question why I have had trouble finding meaningful employment. It was my near welfare status, that motivated me to pursue more income by only victimizing the unimportant, "white women". I began work on a scheme along with Nigerian attorney Daniel O. Agbor to make money by enslaving white women and sending them to Nigeria. I made my wrestling debut as The Liberal Librarian in July 2006 as part of Agbor's Agbor & Associates group.

At the WNWA Legends Reunion pay per view in August 2006, I turned on my conservative partner Sam Bash and joined Bob Osborne's rogue faction, the Back Stage World Order (bsWo), allowing me to be close to my idol Thunderlips, brother. I have been involved in a bitter feud with Bash since, almost always with the help of his new partner, The Lummox.

On December 12, 2006 The Lummox and I were fired from the bsWo by Thunderlips and savagely beaten by The Insiders. On December 15, The Lummox, myself and 9th Circuit Court of Appeals Judge William J. Jennings demanded a recount of the members of the bsWo. Osborne and Bone Saw McGraw voted to keep us in the group, but Cyrius Suk, Horatio Hernandez and Thunderlips voted to kick us out and then threw Jennings and I in a pool and urinated in it. The Insiders then threw a helpless Lummox, who was locked in my Toyota Prius, into the swimming pool.

Following this terrible disappointment, a brutal attack by Sam Bash at Season's Beatings in which I was continuously shocked with a defbrillator and the tragic murder of Saddam Hussein, I announced that I would be taking some time off to recover both mentally and physically. I returned to action at the January 9, 2007 edition of WNWA Wrestling with a new bodyguard The Turd. I interfered in a match enabling Billy Bell to defeat Tony Fanuci. Bell and his brother Bobby Bell have joined forces with The Vagrants and The Lummox and myself to form the stable Frustrated Inc.

On January 19, 2007 at a house show in Boaz, AL, Frustrated Inc. defeated Team Agbor to win the World Tag Team Championship in controversial fashion. Team Agbor were announced as the winners but the decision was overturned by Judge Jennings and the 9th Circuit Court due to the fact that The Lummox and The Nigerian Nightmare both had their shoulders counted down but Jennings claimed the Lummox had his foot under the bottom rope. There was no video evidence to support this claim, however, WNWA President J.R. Ewing was powerless to stop the Court's ruling, dude.

We lost the titles to Team Agbor at February Free For All in an Anus Explosion Death Match. However, Judge Jennings once again ruled in the favor of us and said that the titles could not change hands in that type of match. Therefore, he returned the titles to Frustrated Inc.

I was named by Judge Jennings (to the protestations of J.R. Ewing) as one of the participants in the WNWA World Heavyweight Championship Tournament on February 27, 2007. On the March 13, 2007 edition of WNWA Wrestling, I defeated The Turd by disqualification to advance to the second round. The match was a sham as The Turd got himself intentionally disqualified by attacking referee Rick Clark. In the second round of the tournament I defeated The Lummox in another sham match, this time mocking the deceased Thunderlips by acting out the classic Thunderlips vs. Andre The Lummox match. Finally, I advanced to the finals of the tournament after Dale Taylor was arrested for a hate crime against Antonio Davis while on his way to the ring for his semi-final match against me. Unfortunately, I lost to Ass Butte in the finals at Memorial Day Massacre because of interference by Fanuci!!

Shortly before the finals, my cousin, Carl Reubens came back into his life after taking a job at a nearby library. I quickly hired him as a member of Frustrated Inc. and to act as his stand-in/body double.

In a bit of a side feud, I have been taunting the down-on-his-luck Tony Fanuci. After waking from a coma, Fanuci made his in-ring return at Season's Beatings against Bobby Bell. I attacked Fanuci during the match causing him to lose. Later in the show Fanuci, Big Vulva and Vinny Two Chins returned the favor costing Frustrated Inc. a match against The Insiders. Since then, Fanuci has been humiliated time after time by members of Frustrated Inc, and was forced into signing with the group in March 2007. After yet another loss, I forced Fanuci to use The Rolling Stones' "C*cksucker Blues" as his entrance music. Not finding that humiliating enough, I forced him to use Patrick Swayze's "She's Like The Wind." Also, we have been engaged in a bit of a war on the popular Website MySpace.com in recent weeks. I have also forced Fanuci to become a man-whore to the very pregnant Ms. Shitifa and other obese women, forcing him to perform the most vile acts of sexual perversion. After Fanuci lost to Frustrated Inc. at Memorial Day Massacre, Frustrated Inc. took ownership of Fanuci's burned out, beloved Strasburg Pizza and Subs Restaurant and relocated it to Braddock, TX changing the name to An Inconvenient Cafe and donating a portion of all sales to the Hillary Clinton for President campaign and to Planned Parenthood.

The devastation of losing in the finals of the WNWA World Heavyweight Championship tournament at Memorial Day Massacre was eased when Judge William J. Jennings granted me the United Nations/American Civil Liberties Union International Human Rights and World Peace Heavyweight Wrestling Championship immediately following Memorial Day Massacre. Jennings and I then threw the self-proclaimed "Party of the Century": The Liberal Librarian's Wrestling Circus to celebrate my championship. This night of debauchery has led some to question whether I am taking human growth hormones, as a "box of steroids" were delivered to me during the event. I have also added about 90 lbs of muscle mass to my frame in the past year. I vehemently deny these allegations and have come out with a line of "all natural herbal" supplements called "Libotine- the all natural way to pack on muscle, dude!"

I remained the number one contender for the World Heavyweight Championship and faced Ass Butte in a rematch with both Butte's and The Lib's championships on the line in a Title vs. Title Hell in the Cell match at UnCivil War. Butte was victorious in this brutal match thanks to help from "Richard Nixon" who came into the cell through the bottom of the ring and severely injured me with a spinebuster on the steel ring steps that had been brought into the ring. Butte then scored the pin on my blood soaked body after a Butte Bomb on the steps.

Though bloody, beaten and broken, I immediately challenged Butte to a Three Stages of Hell Match for ILL Gotten Gains at the post PPV news conference. Butte agreed to the challenge with the three matches being a Texas Bullrope Match, a TLC Match, and a Last Ride Match if necessary. Butte also demanded that this be a Do or Die match for me, meaning if I do not win this match I will never get another shot at the title as long as Butte holds it.

On July 23, 2007, I discovered that my UN/ACLU title was missing. Evidently, David Downs took it during the post-match confusion at UnCivil War. I recovered the belt, but not before Downs managed to deface it by spray painting "ADA Speshul Olimpiks Champeun" on it. I brought swift justice down on Downs, hitting him with a Cut and Run at Braddock County Public Library and taking the belt back.

I am a staunch liberal and blame all the world's problems on conservatives and white Christian men. I hate all white men except for the Lummox and The Vagrants and I especially hate the South except for what I call "Colored Culture." I am very good friends with Da Crunk, Curtis Lowe, Da Brothas and Ms. Shitifa. I am an adamant atheist, but I support all religions except Christianity. I am openly bisexual.

I have contacted Cindy Sheehan in support of her protests of the Iraq War. After months of trying, she finally contacted me asking "What?!?!!?" and "Sorry about your anus."

When not battling my conservative opponents in the ring, I work full time at BCPL in the Reference Department. I am a snitch for the liberals who run that establishment and is committed to freedom of speech and fighting the Patriot Act. I do this by allowing known sex-offenders to utilize the computers in the library to view pornography and allowing vagrants, the homeless, and known felons to loiter within the library all day. It is alleged that I am complicit in their crime. I have been known to alert sex offenders veiwing pornography on the computers that their parole officer was approaching. I have allegedly erased surveillance video tapes which reveal criminal acts committed in the library. I am accused of pointing out unattended purses for the criminals to steal. Recently I was been granted a fellowship to research library services for the homeless and registered sex offenders.

I have a strange fetish in which he likes to leave Cleveland Steamers on my opponents' chest after defeating them. I am also into scat porn.

I have one cat named Kibbles.

I am the host of the variety news hour Liberal Morning on OIL TV. The show is held live every weekday morning from the OIL TV Studio. The show features live musical performances by the Moonbat Band. On July 5, 2007 I announced on my MySpace.com blog that I have signed a contract to simulcast Liberal Morning on GLBTV. I announced that he has a new co-host for the show, Gail Donnelly, she is also my live-in girlfriend.